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Can You Background Check Your Ex-Spouse’s New Partner? [updated 2023]


Background check new spouse family split apart
Background investigation on ex-spouse new live-in partne

Are you feeling concerned about the person your ex is now dating? Do you want to make sure they are a safe and trustworthy individual before allowing them to be around your children or close family members? Conducting a background check on your ex's new partner is a good idea to ensure the safety of your loved ones. In this article, we'll walk you through the process of how to conduct a thorough background check and what information you should look for.


Yes, you can background investigate your ex-spouse's new live-in partner. A background check is a good idea when you see red flags alerting you to potentially adverse circumstances that your children may be facing in their new environment. Knowing more about the ex-spouse's new live-in partner gives you clarity on their integrity and character. The cost to hire a private investigator to background check you former partners new partner range from $416 to $2,000, depending upon how deep you want your inquiry to go.


Why Conduct a Background Check?

It's important to know the background of the people your ex-partner is involved with, especially if they will be around your children or other family members. By conducting a background check, you can find out if the person has a criminal history, if they have any red flags in their background, and if they are a safe person to be around. A background check gives you a snap shot into the character of the person, not the whole picture.


What Information Can You Find in a Background Check?

A background check can reveal a wide range of information about a person, including their criminal history, employment history, and financial history. This information can help you determine if the person is trustworthy and safe to be around.


How To Background Check a Live-In Partner

Naturally, you want to understand that if the answer is yes, you can background check your ex-spouse's live-in partner–how would you do that?


The vital point to remember is to do it. Don't think about it; get it done, as I have seen many private investigation clients wish they had done so at the outset of learning the other person had a new partner.



You Could Roll The Dice With Online Sites

As you are probably aware, many online sites say they know better than a real human private investigator. These websites purport that their purely digital data is a better choice than hiring a professional. I'm afraid I have to disagree; yes, I am biased. But here's why.


Online Background Check Sites Are Scraped Data

Generally speaking, many of these online sources are websites scraping information and using it as their formal data. Data scraping refers to computer programs extracting and moving the data to another site.


Even if the data comes directly from the source, say a courthouse, there still can be errors. Some states report up to 40% inaccurate data.


Online Sources Have No Context

The other pitfall is that these sites offer no context. Likely the context a private investigator can bring to the equation is of far greater value than raw data.

Private investigators look at the entirety of the matter and can make observations and recommendations.


Private investigators can compare data in many locations and even find errors within the data. One moment you think that the person did something errant, but once the private investigator connects other dots, you realize that was the wrong "Roger Smith."

A detective reviews data as a clue, connects data from multiple sources and then relates that to the person's identifiers such as birth date, last known phone number, address history, etc.


Why You Should Background Check Your Ex-Spouse Live-In Partner

You don't know what you don't know. Likely you know little to nothing about your ex-partner's new friend. Your ex-partner may not know much about the person them self, let alone you. We have seen that time and again.


Not conducting a background check is dangerous, not only to your ex-spouse but also to any children that may be involved.

I have found subjects of investigation with such histories as:

  • resisting arrest

  • restraining orders

  • lude and lascivious acts on a minor

  • registered sex offenders

  • spousal abuse

  • lying about employment

  • lying about marital status

  • lying about having children

  • faking credentials

  • lying about academic history


These issues I have uncovered are only scratching the surface. Depending on your situation and all the people involved, you can have a custom background check that will answer the questions you need to know.


How to Conduct a Background Check

There are several ways to conduct a background check on someone, including using online background check services or hiring a private investigator. In this section, we'll go over the steps you can take to conduct a background check on your own.


Step 1: Gather Information

The first step in conducting a background check is to gather as much information as you can about the person. This includes their full name, date of birth, and address. You may also want to gather information about any known associates, including their friends and family members.


Step 2: Use Online Background Check Services

There are several online background check services that you can use to gather information about someone's background. These services typically charge a fee, but they are a convenient way to gather information. Some of the most popular online background check services include BeenVerified, Instant Checkmate, and TruthFinder. But, we share this with a grain of salt. We find so many problems with these sites and the data they share in order to make a buck.


Step 3: Check Criminal Records

One of the most important things to look for in a background check is the person's criminal history. You can check criminal records by searching for the person's name on the website of the local police department or by searching for public records on the website of the local court system.


Step 4: Check Employment and Education

It's also important to check the person's employment and education history. You can find this information by searching for their name on websites like LinkedIn or by contacting their past employers or schools directly.


Step 5: Check Financial History

Finally, it's a good idea to check the person's financial history, including their credit report. You can obtain a credit report by contacting one of the three major credit reporting agencies: Equifax, Experian, or TransUnion.


Background Your Ex's Live-In Partner If Children Are Involved

Having a private investigator should seem obvious, but apparently, it isn't. Most people do not background check their live-in partners, and most ex-spouses do not investigate their ex-spouse's new live-in love interests.