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Romance Scams - 3 Things You Need to Know

Okay, first let me start off by saying there is a lot of information out there on romance and dating scams. I don’t really read them because I have been dealing with this for many years as a private investigator. I am going to tell you three things you need to know when dealing with a potential romance scammer or dating lies.

#1 If It Sounds Too Good To Be True It Probably Is

Call me Captain Obvious here, but yes, people still fall for the wild, crazy, unbelievable and the “you’ve got to be kidding” type of outlandish claims a romance scammer shares. People are gullible, and I say that in the nicest way possible. It’s in our human nature to want to believe someone and to care about our fellow human being, especially if we have romantic interests.

This blog article is not to get into the psychology of why people do what they do. It is meant to point to some obvious facts that you need to know when you are meeting someone at an arms length. And, when someone has some crazy story, some wild emotional ride they take you on, they are pulling your strings. They are playing at your heart strings in order to part you from your money. In another article we will delve into what scammers say, but suffice it to say with certainty, that if the story starts off with “Love, I was just arrested in New Zealand while trying to take my millions of dollars out of the country” or some other fantasy, then you better believe no matter how sincere he pretends to be, he is a scammer.

#2 If You Are Recently Divorced or Widowed

You are especially at risk if you are divorced, widowed or just moved into a country to live. Scammers play on emotions and are master manipulator psychopaths who know how to manipulate your present circumstances to their benefit. They prey on the weak, vulnerable, sick, disparaged, tired, hurt and generally depressed people. They are sick in that they will stop at nothing to get you to send them money.

Be especially careful if you:

  • Just lost a loved one. These sociopaths don’t care about your loss. They are there to expose that wound and then use it to empathize with you until you’ve sent them money. They are clever and even if you grieve, they will grieve with you, then concoct a story that gets you wiring them your pension.

  • Went through a divorce. Again, dating scammers will gain your confidence and they understand your lonliness and longing for companionship. They will become your best friend and lover and in the same breath ask you to send them your savings.

  • Are new to a country or area. Dating scammers will look at your current situation if you have moved to a new city, state or country. They will expose your vulnerabilities such as feeling the need for companionship or missing your home. This is just another divisive means to their relentless end.

#3 You Use Social Media

Finally, let me address the elephant in the room. Social media is the catalyst to letting these people influence your life. They learn about you from social media, study your account and find a way to manipulate their way into the front door of your life. Without social media you are generally safe.

So, get off social media! Or, if you refuse to do that, lock it down tight! Or, you will be socially engineered to give your life savings away. Dating scammers look at your media and they look for signs of loneliness, loss, bad relationships and someone’s need for company. They then formulate an attack strategy and they play the long game.

If You Are a Victim of Romance Scammer

If you feel you have been confronted by a possible romance scammer or the victim of a dating scam, contact us immediately. Don’t wait to get confirmation. Most of the time we will flat out tell you it is a romance scam at no cost, but when you really need us to clarify we can and prices start at just $416 for US based dating scammers or $1250 for international investigation. Call us now if you want clarity (707) 908-8226.


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